Become LEET

after you read this, be sure to actually do it! and you can post it on ur blog and yes, if you want, take credit for it!


HOW TO BE LEET ON MARAPETS
(in one month!
Satire by faeriechic22.

Day 1.
Sign up with a super cool username you KNOW people will adore. Maybe something that reflects your interests.. Anime? Great. People LOVE a good fan.
You search for kagomehiguroshi but some other fan named Ivy got it. huh.
You sign up on naruto_8732894 with the numbers being your phone number because you're just smart like that.
Create a pet with a super spiffy name like AnImE_uShuNdA34 and create it as a fasoro.
Portal it.
Rest, You've done enough.

Day 2.
You can finally mail people! Marapal all staff members and people with a post count of over 5,000.
Mail them and say 'hi u look cool. i like ur pets.' Practicing your copying and pasting techniques is good.
Despite the fact that you can't spell, they'll be pretty nice and pal you. Of course there will be the occasional literate who will hate you. Ah well.
Go to the online users list and marapal roughly half of the people there.
Portal your pet, +1 strength? EXCELLENT!
Tired? Give yourself a well deserved rest.

Day 3.
You wake up and find about 50 of the people you asked to marapal accepted you! Now that you look pretty popular, you need to add stuff to your profile. Add large glittery flashing pictures and be sure to use all cap locks.
And no proper grammar at all. That's cool.
Post on all the boards so you're generally recognized all round. Sell veggies on the trades boards.Ask for help not regarding to marapets. Say random things on the non marapets chat. Be sure to add a large animated siggy that'll give everyone an eyesore.
Portal your pet. Done. Rest.

Day 4-7.
Okay now that you have portaled your pet for a week, your stats and pet look something like this:
- Statistics -
Health : 1 / 3
Magic : 10
Level : 2
Strength : 2
Defence : 1
Speed : 3
Charisma : 0
Portal again; FANTASTIC it turned to a grey feliz!! Time to tradeee.
Create a board (TRADING STATTED PET!! RARE!! ), of course using a ton of smileys so you can stretch all the boards.
Ask for a Chibs. Because those are pretty darn cute.
Ignore those who say that it isn't worth it. They're just jealous.
Rest.

Day 8.
People have offering you HORRIBLE pets.
Make a board in protest saying that people should offer GOOD pets for a GOOD pet.
That's never been done before.

Day 9-14.
You have tried all week to trade AnImE_uShuNdA34 AND NO ONE HAS OFFERED!!
Absolutely dispicable.
Create a board, overusing the smiley saying how hardworking you are and how great your pet is but no one will offer.
Marapal the ones that are simpathetic. Send rotten potatoes to the ones that are mean.
Portal, and rest.

Day 15.
Whoa. you have no mp. Make a big board asking for donations. To those who call you a beggar, just say that you are ASKING not BEGGING.
By now you have about eh... 1000 posts. YOU MUST GET HIGHER!!
YOU MUST BE LEET!!
'kay, now go to the help board, post on every board i wish i new but i dont... gl finding help!!
Or even better, you can create a board asking questions that are obvious but you just can't handle. Such as uh where is my shop
After you're done go to the pets board and post on each board Congrats Julie!!
It doesn't matter if the person's name is Julie or not.
They should be honored you even said anything to them.
Rest.

Day 16-17.
Wahooo. 102 marapals (none are very close or know your name but who cares) and 1500 posts. Great progress. You are a star. Not quite though.. Everyone needs a talent right? Either roleplaying, poetry, art..
Hmmm. You know you can't rhyme for crap, and you can hardly write legibly, much less draw.
Roleplaying it is.
Go to the roleplaying boards and say ROLEPLAY!! MARAPOUNDZ/SHELTER!! YEH! As the intro, write,
'once upon a tyme. there was a chibs named barry. he was emo. he was abandond by hiz mommi. he cried.'
Continue, and each response to those who join you should be posting 'barry waz really sad. he was tird and hurted by the owner.'
You don't any more depth than that. They should understand how painful it must've been.
Rest, your creativity has run out for the day.

Day 18.
Everyone is praising your especially *original* roleplay, and now EVERYONE wants to roleplay you. And when you look at your marapals.. people actually requested you!
Yeah baby you are soo cool.
Reject everyone and say that you must wallow in your misery before getting started on such a heartfelt roleplay again.
Then as you wallow, start a board in the spam chat saying HEY I HATE PREPS!! or some other stupid label.
Then marapal the non-preps and send all the preps frozen fish as a representation of how much they smell and how frozen they are inside.
Enough, rest.

Day 20.
After calming down your nerves, you come back and you recieved tons of mail from non preps that praised your board (good idea eh?)and they love your RPing.
You start a club in honour of... well you.
You maramail your best friend who you've said congrats Julie and beg her to join promising her prizes. Julie relents and joins just to shut you up.
Great. Now go to a site where they offer free club layouts, stick an image of your face on one of the marapets, erase the credit and claim as your own.
Its totally obvious you created it all.
Sleep.

Day 21.
Put 'Love is like a bucket of wood shavings' on your profile.
Don't ask why. Just do it.

Day 22-25.
You've advertised your butt off for that club but only 3 people are in the club. I mean c'mon. its a club about YOU for goodness sakes. EVERYONE SHOULD WANT TO JOIN!!
On the bright side you managed to trade that pet of yours for a huthiq from a newbie.
Great, everyone will praise your great trading skills.
Make a new portal pet with a cooler name. You create omgulooklikeapumkin.
Portal, Rest.

Day 26-27.
You decide it is time to finally get back to your RPing. But it seems... that someone has taken the oh so original marashelter idea from you!
NO WAY. create a better more original one.. like Highschool marapets. Yeah. Then in your first post, say that someone stole your creativity and must be punished.
Send them a frozen fish AND a rotten potato.
Haha, fool. Haha.
Rest.

Day 28-30
Kay, you're nearing the end of the month, and you have about 5,000 posts, and 200 friends. omg.
you found a board that Ian himself chatted on!!!
OMG!!
Post once one the board saying I agree wit u ian!! u da man!
Then create another board saying Ian and you are BEST of friends.
That'll bring in somemore marapal requests.
Rest some more you persistent fool.

Day 31
You go back to your club and it turns out there are a grand total of.. 1 people. Julie that jerk. When you're rich&famous, you are going to give her NOTHING!

Make it private, and brag to everyone its the greatest club and about 50 people joined. When they get interested, send them an invite and say that the number on the club sidebar is a glitch.
OKEY. you've saved little by little, by selling those lemon gumballs for like 10k each to unsuspecting newbies. Now you've got.. 457k! You are rolling in the money.
you've got 5231 posts, 227 friends..
And you are hailed as the one to speak out against all preps and the greatest roleplay ever.

Now since it's been a month you should... do something special. Create a board on the pet forum (your fave forum) and announce you are leaving because this life is just not worth it. Say that you have been viciously attacked, ideas have been STOLEN from you, and people just don't appreciate little ol' you.
Make a big deal, wait till about 50 people say AH DON'T LEAVE!! and then make another one saying
'Okay. My friends have convinced me to stay. thanks guys '

By now your ego is huge, and you have prepared a speech for the benefit of the people.

'Dere fello maradanz. u guyz hav assisted me in producing. becuz of u guyz, i now encompass full sized aortic pumps.
u guys r my unsurpassed companions. thank u, i couldn't subsist without u.'

Everyone will now call you a brilliant speechmaker. Good idea to use that thesaurus.
Now that you are well known, make a retarded board (that NO ONE is annoyed of) on the spam chat asking AM I WELL NOWN?
And for sure, everyone will recognize you either as the gumball seller, item sender, excellent roleplayer, kind congradulater, or overall good person.

You are now leet. Congratulations.