chapter 5

The only person who would have been able to make my mother smile right now was her best friend. I wasn't talking about Alice or me or even her soul mate and my father Edward. It was Jake.

He came rushing, surprisingly in human form, to us. He had on a scruffy t-shirt and shorts, so obviously he had not came all the way as a human. He wasted no time and immediately asked what was wrong.

"I was going to your house, you know, to ask about your day at school," he told me. "But before I got in there I didn't smell an ounce of human in your house, just the stink of bloodsucker." Normally Bella would have made Jake pay for using that word but she just sniffed, not moving from her position. Jake noticed this too and his face filled with confusion and even fear.

"What did they do, Nessie?" Jake demanded to know. "What did he do?" By he, Jake meant Edward. He looked at me expectantly then turned to Bella. "Bella?" he asked her, she didn't move. He crouched down so we were around the same height.

"Bella?" he spoke louder. "BELLA! CAN YOU HEAR ME?"

She raised her head and looked deeply into Jake's eyes. For a second I thought she was going to break down again but then she screamed, "YES I CAN HEAR YOU JAKE, I'M NOT DEAF!" Jake started howling with laughter, me joining him; Bella smiled slightly. I knew Jake could make her smile.

"Tell me what happened," Jacob said as soon as he stopped laughing. I sighed and placed m hand on his burning hot cheek, letting the afternoon events fill his mind. At first he was scowling but by the end of it he looked just as furious as Edward.

"How dare that filthy bloodsucker say that to you!" he was outraged. "And to Bella! If only I could-" He stopped in thought and looked at Bella expectantly.

"No you can not!" she told him fiercely.

"Sure, stick up for the monster," Jake grumbled.

"I stook up for this little monster and she turned out perfectly," Bella replied squeezing me fondly.

"Better than perfect," Jake smiled at me.

Jake sat at the other side of Bella, one hand over her shoulder. The heat of his skin kept me warm but must have been burning Bella but she never said a word.

Then she jumped up. I'm guessing she had tried to jump onto her feet but with my arm and Jake's over her she only jumped up and inch.

"Crap, I forget to give you your medicine," she told me and started fumbling with her pocket until finally she got a small white pill out, a little bigger than a tic-tac. I sighed and popped into my mouth, swallowing the revolting taste down.

Bella sighed too and brushed her messy back into an even messier ponytail. "We have to get back."

"No, we don't," I told her. "You told him we'll be back whenever. Anyway, you're still upset."

Yeah," Jake agreed. "You wouldn't want him to see you like this, he'd be mortified... actually, going back may not be such a bad idea. I would like to see the look on his face..."

Bella chuckled. "Seriously, we have to go. Nessie's got school tomorrow."

"Then I'll just go home," I told her. "You still need to calm down."

"Me? You're the one who nearly attacked your own father," Bella mumbled.

"Wish I could've seen that," Jake laughed again. I removed my arm from Bella's shoulder's.

"Stay," I ordered her as she started to stand up. "But come back when you feel better." I turned to look at Jacob. "I'm trusting you, when she comes back she better be jumping for joy."

"Easy peasy," Jake smiled. I turned and ran back to the small cottage that stood waiting for me. I stopped outside it for a moment and took a deep breath. Calm thoughts, I told myself,
calm thoughts. Mom wouldn't forgive me if I hurt dad, even after what he had said.

I opened the front door carefully. Edward was waiting for me standing only 4 feet away from the door, still as a statue until I came in.

"I am so sorry, Nessie," he apologized. "I had no right to say that to you or Bell-" He stopped and realized that mom was not behind me.

"Where's Bella?" he asked.

"With Jake," I answered.

"What?" he hissed. "Why did you-"

"He's cheering her up!" I shouted then stomped up the stairs into my room.

I was panting by the time I got there but I had no idea why. Before I did anything else I listened carefully to what Edward was doing. I heard him sigh, maybe even hold his head in his
hands, and mutter, "Think, always think before you speak. You'll end up losing them both."

I gulped. I felt so guilty then. I was the one who started it. Why did I have to eat so quickly? Why did I answer like that when he asked me if I had... I shuddered. Why couldn't I defend
myself? Why had I let my best friend/mother Bella get involved? Why had I lunged for my very own father? And worst of all, why had I been born? I didn't deserve my father's care or protectiveness. I definitely didn't deserve my mother's kindness or generosity or selflessness. She had loved me so much when she was pregnant even though I caused her pain and this was how I re-payed her?

I snapped out of my thoughts, knowing that I shouldn't be thinking like that. "It dosen't matter about the past," Bella had once told me. "It's all about the present."

I took my medicine, brushed my teeth and changed into my pink silk pajamas that Alice had gotten me. I was about to go downstairs to apologise to my dad when I heard the front door open. Mom was home.

She wouldn't have wanted me to eavesdrop so I climbed into my bed and closed my eyes. Slowly, I drifted off.

I'm not sure if it was a dream but I felt cold fingers brush my hair away my face and his cool lips lightly kiss my forehead.

"Goodnight Nessie," dad whispered. "I love you."

"Love you too," I murmured. "So sorry dad." He tucked me further into bed and then all I heard was the door close, or open? I fell deeper and deeper into dreamland.

I suddenly woke up sweating and panting.

"Nessie, what's wrong?" Bella asked concerned. Why was she in my room?

"Sweetie are you okay?" Edward asked softly. He was here too?

"I...um..." my head was spinning and I felt very dizzy. "I was just remembering what happened tonight," I lied, hoping that Bella was still shielding me or else Edward would have known the real reason...

"Don't worry, Nessie," Edward cooed. Yes, she was still blocking me. "Your mother was kind enough to forgive me. I hope you can too."

"I already have," I said. Edward smiled and sang me my lullaby. It was similar to the one he used to sing to Bella before when she still could sleep. Bella sat at the edge of my bed and held my hand until I fell asleep.

I had the same dream. I was running again, the creature chasing after me. But I saw strange bright lights flashing ahead of me. I glanced up quickly and saw not trees or a dark sky, but lights going on and off, hanging from the dull beige ceiling. Just from that view I knew where I was; Forks High School.

Hurriedly, I escaped into one of the nearest classrooms and pushed one of the desk against the door to block it.

I didn't know what I had been thinking. I mean, barricading it with a measly little desk I could pick up with one hand? Obviously that creature could break through. With no other option, I went for the only exit left. The window.

Opening the latch, I climbed out at lightning speed and bounded past the school buildings but then reached to a halt. I had never been into this part of the school yet.

Suddenly the scenery in front of me faded away.
Huh?

I turned to my right, not turning right around in case It saw me. But I was safe - for a moment at least - because I could here the creature still in the school.

To my right one of the building's marked 6 was there, I had had Algebra in there before. I hadn't gone any farther than that yesterday. I turned to face forwards again. Still it was black. I remembered my school map. Wasn't the teacher's parking lot here?

Amazingly, a parking lot appeared. In some of the spaces I saw the name's of some of my teacher's.

Wait! I thought. Wasn't this MY dream? Couldn't I change it? I grinned in excitement - I was finally going to conquer the creature. Before I could turn, though, I heard a beeping noise.

I blinked many times before I opened my eyes for real. Crap. Back to reality. And I was just about to defeat the Creature.

I noticed the beeping was in truth coming from my bedside clock. I was so brainless, I never knew it had an alarm.

How do you turn it off? I wondered. There must have been a button but I wasn't bothered finding it. I picked the beeping clock off my bedside table then threw it at the hard wooden floor. It shattered into pieces. Bella could always buy me another.

I silently got out of bed and ready for school.