Crissie, Sissie, and Missy

This is an archive of all the advices from our club advice column. Every advice will be add here, because we can have them all in the club main.

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5/09/08

To Crissy, Sissy and Missy,
I have a friend and we really like each other. I also have another really good friend, and we get along as well! But my friends don't like each other, they're always fighting! What do I do?
~tonguetied

To Tonguetied,
I agree that this is a difficult situation. But you must keep your head high. You must bring your friends together and tell them how you feel. If they understand, they are truly good friends, if they do not, then they are not. They don't have to start playing, explain to them, but ask them politely to please get along for your sake as their friend, so they don't make life hard for you.
From Crissy, Sissy and Missy

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5/09/08

To Crissy, Sissie and Missy
I have alot of friends but we fight alot and cant stop. I would really like to stop fighting and so do my friends but some of us are sensitive and we fight over nothing alot, I've tried everything i can think of including talking to them but it did not turn out to well. Do you have any Ideas?
~ BubbleTrouble

To BubbleTrouble,
I understand that it didn't work out when you tried to talk to them. Perhaps you could try doing an activity which you all enjoy where you don't argue in, if this doesn't work the only thing to do is tell your parents or the teacher. If you can't vent your feelings to them, then that is the only thing you can do. If there is a nice teacher who you like, or your mum, perhaps, it will help to unload all your feelings on someone, trust us, we've been through it ourselves.
From Crissy, Sissy and Missy

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7/09/08

To Crissy, Sissy and co.,
I have been best friends with this girl since forever and now one of my other friends is trying to steal her, what shall i do?
~ Raspberry.
To Raspberry,
Talk to your friend, tell her how you feel. If she isn't a good friend then she will probably go with this other person. If she does, don't be sad, be strong and don't run after her. Prove that you can still enjoy yourself without her, and there may be other people in your class who are nice. Try to have more than one friend, it helps.
From Sissy

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7/09/08

To Crissy, Sissy, and Missy,
My oldest friend, who is very close to me, has sort of alienated himself from me.. He isn't like before, when we would always sit together at lunch.. He hangs out with other people now, mostly boys. I want to still have my old friend, but I also want him to meet new friends..What should I do?
~ Lost in thought

To Lost in thought,
It is very hard when that happens. The same thing happened to me. But there is only one thing you can do which is the right and mature way to go. He has moved on, and, even though it hurts, you will have to move on as well. It is what he wants, and, like you said, you wanted him to be happy. If he comes back to you then accept him, for you can still be friends even if he doesn't hang out with you so much. You must be strong, try to get friendly with people in your class, and it is better to have several friends than one so if someone goes away, you have another.
From Crissy, Sissy and Missy

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9/09/08

To crissy, sissy and missy
My friends like to talk when I am trying to tell them something ant. I hate it when people do that. What should I do?
-Feeling left out

To Feeling Left Out,
When your friends are not talking try to tell them how you feel, and if they don't listen walk away. They should realise then that you are upset, and if they don't care they are not good friends.
From Crissy, Sissy and Missy

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10/09/08

To Crissy, Sissy and Missy,
I'm a very social person, but i have problems to talk about my fellings. It's really hard for me to open up with friends or family, how can i changed this?
~LShaoran

To LShaoran,
I am a rather social person. I have extremely emotional feelings about how I feel about my parents divorce. All of the pressure is on me, should I go to live with my dad in London or stay in Wales with my mum? Then my younger sister is my responsibility as well. It is very hard, and I am sure that you must have gone through a lot too. But you must tell someone your feelings, you don't know how good it feels when after years of keeping your emotions bottled up inside yourself, you can just empty them on someone. It can sometimes be painful saying it, and there can be a few tears, but once you have done it you feel relieved, like a load has been taken off your shoulders. So, please, if you want to feel better, talk to the person who is closest to you and who understands you the most. I am sure it will help you.
From Sissy

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19/09/08

To Crissie, Sissy and Missy,
I have a friend but she is also like a bully sometimes... All my friends don't like her and i'm not sure what to do!!! So what do you think? ~Dark Rainbow

To Dark Rainbow,
You should explain to your friend nicely that she can sometimes bully others without knowing it. If your friend won't listen or begins to bully you, you should stand up for yourself and find a new friend. If she understands then that means she does care about how you feel and you should give her another chance.
~Sissie

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20/09/08
To Crissie, Sissy and Missy,
II need help, one of my friends tried out for Rock Challenge, a club where you compete against different schools, in dancing, and performing arts. She got through to the second round, but me and my other friends hear the teacher say that she wouldn't make it through to the next round, because she wasn't strong enough and cried to get in. Should i tell her or let her do the trial knowing she won't get through?
~GoodFriend
To GoodFriend ,
Yes, you must be in a difficult position. Well, if you tell her she will be hurt and probably won't want to talk to you, so don't do that. But if you don't say anything, she will end up being upset anyway. Whatever happens, you can't stop her from feeling a little bit upset that she didn't get through, but perhaps there is one way to make her feel less upset when the time comes. Tell her thatif she doesn't win, she has tried. Tell her that life isn't fair but there are always good things in life. Perhaps after she has been given the bad news, you could give her a treat by inviting her over for a sleepover in something to cheer her up. Perhaps then she will forget about it.
~Sissie

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20/09/08
To Crissie, Sissy and Missy,
I have two best friends but one of them is annoyed with us and wont talk to us anymore, what shall i do?
~Monkey
To Monkey,
Ask your friend why she is annoyed with you, and tell her nicely that you will try to be as good a friend as possible. It may be that she is going through a lot in her life, and is taking it out on you and your other friend. Talk to her, ask her if anything is wrong and be as reassuring as possible. If talking to her doesn't work, then give her some space. Perhaps she wants more time alone, or maybe she's moving on.
~Sissie

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20/09/08
To Crissie, Sissy and Missy,
I know this guy and he never stops bugging me!!! I've asked him to stop more than once and he does it to everyone! Its just SO rude! I've told teachers and parents and friends but nothing works. I have tried to show him how i feel and everything! I've been strong. Now i cant think of anything though!
~Buggers and Bullies
To Buggers and Bullies,
Try to stand up for yourself without starting a fight. If that doesn't work, then try to keep your distance. Without making it obvious, try to keep away from him, if you keep away from him he shouldn't bully you. If he still goes up to you and bullies you, the only thing you can do is tell the teachers and your parents even though you have told them before. If that doesn't work and the bully gets TOO much then call a Anti Bullying helpline. But that's only if he is physically bullying you and really making your life miserable.
~Sissie

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3-Oct-08
Dear Crissie, Sissy and Missie,
I need help, this boy asked me out and i want to go out with him, but i want it to last for a long time and not be short like a few months. What shall I do because if I say that, he won't wait.
From TroubledGirl
To TroubledGirl,
See how the date goes and get to know him. You need to be positive that you definitely like him for who he is and it is the same thing with him. After the date, do not run after him and get too desperate or eventually he will go away from you. And you can't try and keep far away from him, try to make it so he comes to you, so you are not too desperate. And make time for him, where you can just hang out with him and have fun. And finally, don't feel stressed. It won't help.

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10-Oct-08
To Crissy, Sissy and Missy,
I like a boy at school but i do not want to wait until i am in high school to tell him. I am only in 4th grade.he is nice and i think he looks cute but my bff dos not like him she hates him.
~Winter
To Winter, How much older is he? If he is close to your age then explain to your friend how you feel if you really, really like him. But do you actually know him? You can't fall for someone just because he may look nice. It is the personality that counts. And by the time you get to high school you could have easily changed your mind. There are probably other boysin your class who may have matured by then, and you might like someone else instead. So don't be eager, be patient. And when you are in high school, ONLY then, you can start worrying about it if you still like him. And respect your friend, remember this, friends always come first, above boyfriends. In some cases, your boyfrien may be one of your best friends, that is a good relationship. ~ Sissy
From Sissie

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18/10/08

To Sissie,
My friend has never had a birthday party before and she is coming up thirteen, me and my other friend organised it, and invited 2 girls which she didn't like. Then, everyone wasd having arguments and they said they don't want to do it anymore, me and my other friend were relieved and we are just going to take her out for a meal. Then this girl came a long and claims she spent 1000 pounds on catering and Entertainment for it. We don't believe this can be true, but what shall we do?
~From TroubledTruffle

ToTroubledTruffle,
Well, it must have been very nice of that girl who spent that much money, but i think that you should just go with your friends, and the main thing is that your friend who is having her birthday is happy. That is more important than anything else. Tell your mum if it is really bugging you. Your mum will probably say the same. All you can do at the end is go up to that girl and say that you are really sorry, but you just want to make your friend happy and you want to just go with her and your other friend. Say that you are very grateful for the money that girl spent but you never actually asked her to spend all of that money. She had just done it. It will be hard explaining, but at the end you will be glad that you did talk to her. Good luck!
~From Sissie

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14/11/08
To Crissie, Sissie and Missy,
We are eight in our circle of friends...all girls...just recently it got divided into two...four each...because of secrecy adn lack of trust i guess(of the other four, they used to have whisper conversation whenever we are around)
graduation is almost near...but the enmity between each other is strong...sigh..i miss the days when we're eight...

Stick with your friends, and accept what is happening. Life isn't always like we wish it could be, unfortunately. As kids grow older, and go into high school, they break up with friends, and make new ones. This, my friend, is the circle of high school life. You lose friends because you just fade, you don't have enough in common. You realise that you have more in common than you thought with the nice girl who sits at the back of the classroom, and she becomes your best friend.
If graduation is near, then your friendships will probably fade anyway. You will all walk along different paths. But it is nice to keep contact with the odd few who you don't want to forget so easily.
Don't worry, just let life choose its path and see what happens, and enjoy life! Who knows, you may all unite at the end.
~Sissy

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10/12/08

To Sissy,
There is this boy i like, and he likes me, but he likes 3 other people as well, and even though we can't help it, we try and make each other jealous and it works, what should we do?
From (anonymous)
......................................
To (anonymous),
It may be that he likes one of the three others more but is too nervous to say so, or he hasn't made up his mind yet. Give him time to decide which one he likes the most. Even though you can't help it, it is wrong to make others jealous, because something very bad will probably become of it. They may consider you to be a bully, and may be emotionally hurt. Don't purposely make them jealous, but you can still hang out with him, whatever he decides. For now, just be casual around him, but friendly with the other girls as well, and see how things go.
From Sissy